“Men talk to women so they can sleep with them and women sleep with men so they can talk to them.” – Jay McInerney
“To succeed with the opposite sex, tell her you’re impotent. She can’t wait to disprove it.” – Cary Grant
“A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation.” – Karl Kraus
“Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you.” – Maori proverb
“When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.” – Gracie Allen
“If you’re going to be sexy in a photo, you’d better be thinking about sex rather than about being sexy.” – Peta Wilson
“A spaniel, a woman, and a walnut tree, the more they’re beaten the better they be.” – John Ray
“A kiss is an inquiry on the second floor as to what’s going on on the first floor.” – Theresa Russell
“Beer will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no beer.” – Freddie Freak
“90 people get the swine flu and everybody wants to wear a mask. A million people have AIDS and no one wants to wear a condom.” – Anonymous
“The appropriate age for marriage is around eighteen for girls and thirty-seven for men.” – Aristotle (384 BC – 322 BC)
“I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.” – Patrick Murray
“When you destroy the old, a new era begins.” – Mao Tse-Tung
“A kiss without a hug is like a flower without the fragrance.” – Maltese proverb
“By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day.” – Robert Frost
“Half the money I spend on advertising is wasted; the trouble is I don’t know which half.” – John Wanamaker
“He who has a ‘why’ to live, can bear with almost any ‘how’.” – Friedrich Nietzsche
“The secret of happiness is freedom. The secret of freedom is courage.” – Thucydides (460-404 BC)
“News is what somebody somewhere wants to suppress; all the rest is advertising.” – Alfred Harmsworth
“I’m willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.” – Samuel Goldwyn
“Aim for the sky and you’ll reach the ceiling. Aim for the ceiling and you’ll stay on the floor.” – Bill Shankly
“Me having no education, I had to use my brains.” – Bill Shankly
“The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” – Oscar Wilde
“I like to have a martini, two at the very most. After three I’m under the table, after four I’m under my host.” – Dorothy Parker
“Money is a strange thing. It ranks with love as our greatest source of joy, and with death as our greatest source of anxiety.” – Joe Moore
“Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow. It’s what sunflowers do.” – Helen Keller
“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles Schulz
“Money enables us to get what we want instead of what other people think we want.” – George Bernard Shaw
“Money doesn’t make you happy. I now have 50 million but I was just as happy when I had 48 million.” – Arnold Schwarzenegger
“Sorry, something went wrong. A team of highly trained monkeys has been dispatched to deal with this situation.” – Error 500 on YouTube
“Take a lesson from the mosquito. She never waits for an opening — she makes one.” – Kirk Kirkpatrick
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” – Mahatma Gandhi
“I and my brothers against my cousins, I and my brothers and my cousins against the world.” – Widely-quoted Bedouin saying
“The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn’t been asleep.” – Wilson Mizner
“First learn the meaning of what you say, and then speak.” – Epictatus
“No smile is so beautiful as the one that struggles through tears.” – Margaret Fishback Powers
“At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet.” – Plato
“By blood, I’m Albanian. By citizenship, an Indian. By faith, I’m a Catholic nun. As to my calling, I belong to the world.” – Mother Teresa
“If we can hump dead animals and antelopes, then there’s no reason that a man and another man can’t elope.” – Eminem
“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.” – Dr. Seuss
“The single most important component of a camera is the twelve inches behind it.” – Ansel Adams
“Love me when I least deserve it because that is when I really need it.” – Swedish proverb
“As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.” – Oscar Wilde
“Women’s intuition is the result of millions of years of not thinking.” – Rupert Hughes
“The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.” – Ann Landers
“Be greedy when others are fearful and fearful when others are greedy.” – Warren Buffett
“Someone is sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago.” – Warren Buffett
“The fact that people will be full of greed, fear or folly is predictable. The sequence is not predictable.” – Warren Buffett
“Tell me and I’ll forget; show me and I may remember; involve me and I’ll understand.” – Ancient Chinese proverb
“This is all happening because my father didn’t buy me a train set as a kid.” – Warren Buffett
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This one really saved me a lot of time searching on the internet. You are awesome. Keep up the good work.