“Dear Mom, I love you with all my heart. I just wasn’t meant for this world! I hope I can find a place of peace and happiness, a place I am child enough to live, yet man enough to survive. I love you! I hope you can truly believe me. Maybe on my journey I’ll find Jesus. Pray for me mom. Pray I will find happiness. I hurt so bad inside! I want it all to go away. I want a new beginning. I am not afraid to die mom. I’m just so afraid of tomorrow!
To all my friends and loved ones, I ask of you one last favor: don’t let my spirit die. Remember me for the laughs and the good times, the thrills we all had together. I hope I made a place in all your hearts and touched each and every one of you in a special way. I have chosen to die, but I haven’t chosen to be forgotten. I must find a new world, a world of peace and happiness. I want you all to know I am not afraid to die, only to quit living. I’ll miss you.”
“The survival of the fittest. Adios Unfit.”
“I’m going to put myself to sleep now for a bit longer than usual. Call the time eternity.”
“I have no family and no friends, very little food, no viable job and very poor future prospects. I have therefore decided that there is no further point in continuing my life. It is my intention to drive to a secluded area, near my home, feed the car exhaust into the car, take some sleeping pills and use the remaining gas in the car to end my life.”
“I’m not sure why I’m writing this. I went online to look up information on suicide: statistics, methods and all that stuff. I was raised in a family where I went to church every Sunday and was taught the importance of faith and God in our lives. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t help me. I got hurt… bad… when I was a child. I was hurt in a way that no person, no little child should be hurt. I think about suicide on a daily basis… sometimes it’s all that I can think about. I’ve been hospitalized for attempts before. I’ve been put on medications to help the depression… the mental disorders that doctors are so quick to diagnose. I’m sick of it all. Why should I bother trying anymore? I’m not even afraid of dying. I’m not afraid of pain. I just want to leave this world. Please pray for me. I’m tired of trying.”
“Dear World, I am leaving you because I am bored. I feel I have lived long enough. I am leaving you with your worries in this sweet cesspool – good luck.”
“I have a feeling I shall go mad. I cannot go on longer in these terrible times. I shan’t recover this time. I hear voices and cannot concentrate on my work. I have fought against it but cannot fight any longer.”
“I must end it. There’s no hope left. I’ll be at peace.”
“If I can’t see my daughter here, I will see her from above…”
“I’m trying to watch TV but I don’t know what I’m watching. It’s so lonely here. I want to sleep but it just won’t come. I’m so tired of hurting and being a lone. I keep thinking about the pills in the cabinet but I’m scared. My head hurts so much from crying but if I take anything for it I’m scared I won’t stop and I would want to stop.”
“I don’t have any choice in the matter. To make everything better I have to die. I can’t make it right by living. I’m so scared I want out but oh I don’t know.”
“I’m so cold, please do something. I can’t stand this empty feeling that I’m having. My head is horrible. Stop the pounding it hurts so much. I have no control over anything in my life. I’m breaking into pieces. Somebody do something.”
“What is a few short years to live in hell. That is all I get around here. No more I will pay the bills. No more I will drive the car. No more I will wash, iron & mend any clothes. No more I will have to eat the leftover articles that was cooked the day before. This is no way to live. Either is it any way to die. Her grub I can not eat. At night I can not sleep. I married the wrong nag-nag-nag and I lost my life.”
“My kisses burn into your soul,
My touch melts upon your skin,
My eyes reflect my misery
Of the darkness deep within,
I am a waste of time,
So now I shall die.”
“The time has come for me to move on. I don’t come to this decision lightly, however, but now that I’m older, I’ve finally realized that there’s a world of difference between living happily ever after and just living ever after. I may seem strong. But I’m not I’m just like anyone else. We can feel pain. We can die. And I won’t be the one to destroy anyone else’s hopes and dreams. Never again.
“I’m sacrificing myself to save the countless many who would have to die if I were to live. It’s a noble cause, I figure. A good reason to die. I like to think you’d agree.”
“So that’s it. That’s me. Leaving the world to be a better place.”
“I feel certain that I am going mad again. I feel we can’t go through another of those terrible times. And I shan’t recover this time. I begin to hear voices, and I can’t concentrate. So I am doing what seems the best thing to do. You have given me the greatest possible happiness. You have been in every way all that anyone could be. I don’t think two people could have been happier ’til this terrible disease came. I can’t fight any longer. I know that I am spoiling your life, that without me you could work. And you will I know. You see I can’t even write this properly. I can’t read. What I want to say is I owe all the happiness of my life to you. You have been entirely patient with me and incredibly good. I want to say that — everybody knows it. If anybody could have saved me it would have been you. Everything has gone from me but the certainty of your goodness. I can’t go on spoiling your life any longer. I don’t think two people could have been happier than we have been.”
“To my friends: my work is done. Why wait?”
“When all usefulness is over, when one is assured of an unavoidable and imminent death, it is the simplest of human rights to choose a quick and easy death in place of a slow and horrible one.”
“”Football season Is over. No more games. No more bombs. No more walking. No more fun. No more swimming. 67. That is 17 years past 50. 17 more than I needed or wanted. Boring. I am always bitchy. No fun for anybody. 67. You are getting greedy. Act your old age. Relax, this won’t hurt.”
“Goodbye, my friend, goodbye
My love, you are in my heart.
It was preordained we should part
And be reunited by and by.
Goodbye: no handshake to endure.
Let’s have no sadness — furrowed brow.
There’s nothing new in dying now
Though living is no newer.”
“All fled–all done, so lift me on the pyre;
The feast is over, and the lamps expire.”
“Absolutely no reason except I have a toothache.”
You guys need help, before you do something rash.. Life isn’t that bad, especially you young ones. Life is good once you gain your freedom, and live on your own. If you are depressed, then go get help, and get better. You have to FIGHT for it, you can’t just lie down and give up. We’re all going to die anyways, so we might as well create a life for ourselves, even if it means fighting for it, because it’s worth it. Make an impact in the people around you. Do something great for yourself and others, and see the true wonder and the joy life brings. But it doesn’t happen by itself, you have to make it happen. Fight! Fight! Come on! Fight for your life! make the choice now!
i have been suicidle since ive been 11 and ive tried many times but all to no avail.i was adopted as baby step dad abused me family hated me was homesless for 2years got in abusive relationship had 3kids and found out their dad had been sexually abusing them when they babys all my kids was taken into care and for 2years i fought for them but i lost i had to say goodbye for good a few weeks ago and try and explain to a 5 n 6yr old why they wouldnt see me again that was the last straw for me i was agood mom and love my kids more than anything thats why i fink its better if i end my life for good and i cant hurt them anymore and i cant take the pain anymore of people judgeing me.i cant stand to be around kids anymore and lock myself up i have a wonderful bf who has stuck by me but he doesnt understand how i feel and why i would want to end my life i needed to get this out to someone before i did it
Wow, I have read the majority of your notes but when I got to the 13 year old girl my heart fell.
You are all beautiful people & to allow some duffus to come into your life & take your sanity & your dignity is just wrong. Don’t get me wrong, I know how you feel, I have felt your pain, all of you but you have so much in front of you. Every one of you will love & be loved, many of you will have beautiful children & grandchildren who worship you & see you as the centre of their universe. It is easy to ask for forgiveness for the pain you will cause loved ones, but remember, you won’t be here to find out if you are forgiven. There is so much happiness & love out there but it isn’t going to just fall into your lap. If you are contemplating doing the deed please pause for just 1 minute. If you are terminally ill & can’t take the pain any longer then yes, you have my blessing, but if you have just been dumped, realised you are gay & can’t tell anybody or live the lie any longer, married the wrong person or are basically just depressed, STOP.
You are not the only person out there that feels this way. There are people out there who will love you & shag your brains out till the day you die, there are people out there that need you in their lives & that want you there too.
So, before you open that pill bottle, cock that trigger, sharpen that knife or stick the hose over your tail pipe remember this. YOU ARE LOVED & ALWAYS WILL BE. I would rather be there to reap the benefits (cuddles, kisses, praise etc) than have someone standing over my grave saying “You had no idea how much I loved you, if only you were here now I would make you the happiest person that ever lived”.
You don’t know me & probably never will, but please, before you do anything with which there is no return consider where you will be when the monkeys take over the planet & if you wanna chat FB is there for a reason, not just cafe world & poker. (I’m there too)
Take care of yourselves. x
I never got those meds and now all i can think about is how i should off myself. I can’t help the thought that i want it to be very painful and last a while. I don’t know why i feel i deserve pain, i think i am a pretty good person, but i just want to go painfully.
My lord, how the hell could you actually talk about suicide! This isn’t a fucking joke. This is how I lost my Dad, my best friend. This is so selfish. Absolutely selfish! Do you think about the people that love and care about you? What the hell will they do when you leave? Selfish. Fucking selfish.
The only thing that has ever kept me alive is my children. Noone that has entered or left my life has done anything but take from me one way or another. If it were not for my kids, I would have been dirt many years ago. But it is so hard to keep going on also. I have tried many times to find a way for them to live happily without me, but I am afraid noone will care for them as I do. Therefore I live for them. Will I go when they dont need me any longer? I will probably be long gone by then anyway, not of my own doings, but of the life I live.
“Axie”-It is people like you who make us feel the way we do at times. Go away!
I have asked for help many times. The “helpers” usually dont care whether we live or die, as long as they get paid. And why do I have to wait so long to see a dr? Do they not realize the severity of these problems? People keep asking “why didnt you just ask for help” They dont want you to ask them though. I have asked everyone I know, but noone knows what to do. God has even shut me out at this point I believe. I am worth nothing to anyone but my children.
I hope you all find a will in something if not within yourselves. I hate to see others feeling the way I do. I wish I were the only sad soul.
For all you saying that people who don’t think about others when they commit suicide, maybe if you people are a little nicer, then suicide wouldn’t be necessary. Most people who have good relationships don’t commit suicide.
Screwedup: I agree with you, most people who have good relationships doesn’t commit suicide…
im so tired of life every single breath i take is like fighting for life
i dunno what to say here but for the past weeks since my brokeup with my other woman….. 😀
i always wanted to commit suicide. is this fear?
well ppl i will do it in few sec. i m 21 life is just pain. no happy hours left in this life i wont start over i just end it
I love you all very much, but I cannot do this anymore. Life is not for me.
please visit in the Philippines and you will see….You are lucky you have what others don’t……
please be strong , i hate my life too but i love my family…..that’s why i chose to live,,
sorry for my grammar…
21 year old here, i think that those thoughts stem from a lack of perspective. I have been down that lonely road, but only in my head. I thought if I can be this miserable, is it possible that i could be supremely happy at another point? that gives me hope.
And only today i realized how many people are really in my life (many more than i thought). anyways i found a way out is for self respect. anyone with similar thoughts?
I took someones meds the other day and I was as happy as ever. I have not been happy for so long and when I took them I became so happy that I had one of the best days of my life. I realized that I will never be happy while going threw life without meds so life really is not worth it. If I can not live a normal life like I used to about 3 years ago when I was never depressed without the use of medications then why would I prolong my life any longer.
Ooh god never think this day will came here it’s sorry mom you will not going to see me again.i hate 2morrow i don’t want getup and start to cry.i wasn’t like this i was happy more than anybody when i was in college,when my gf really loves me now have nothing feel like i’m killing some dudu b/c me don’t kill me god i don’t know what i’m feeling some part scard don’t know what is up there,some part happy when i wake i could be some where new amazing or with god…….thank you for having me love you mom.
I just wish the world would disappear. I hate it an I hate my life. I want it to end. I don’t want to exist. Everything sucks. I can’t concentrate on anything any more. I want it to stop. to finish. We’re all fallen angels, the in-between. I hate the middle. It sucks always did always will and I’m going to do something about it. This is my last letter….
i was going to do it, i planned it out, but i’ve changed my mind permanently about a week ago. all you others, just know that there is hope. you can find it by reading marquez like i did, or somewhere else, but there is hope, just have to find it. it gets better. there are people who care, or potentially will care. there is solace. there is peace. there is hope.
If you are having thoughts of suicide, please. Go get help! If you are having suicidal thoughts please contact the suicide hotline at 1-800-273-8255. Life is worth living even though it may seem like it’s not. Please know that you are loved and there is always tomorrow!
Life is looking better now, because of my medications, but I still feel as if everything is a waste of time. I have decided that I am not going to kill myself if I get anymore depressed, but instead I will leave the country. I think this is the healthiest approach. I have a trip with some friends all ready to go to New York, but i’m not going home with them. I will keep in contact with everyone for a while to let them know I am ok but my main goal is to travel around until I reach india, where I will make it my home for a couple years and then maybe if things are not going the way I planned I will go home and start over from scratch. I have the passports and everything so it will not be illegal for me to live in india. Oh, and I have excepted death and what ever happens to me I am ready. I scare people with my blatant disregard for my own well being and I almost killed myself so now Im just going to let fate take me into the eternal blackness once it is my time to die.
My brain hurts, I can’t take this any longer. I need to get the **** out of here. My body is my prison and my mind is my tormentor. I need to either leave this life behind and start over from scratch, or detach the the tormentor from the prison. The pain is becoming too great to handle. I love nothing and feel loved by no one. I can not enjoy anything that I once held dear. I do not want to admit myself to a hospital or anything, but I feel I might have too. I have started to develop tics, and when I am just walking around I do not realize that I am thinking out loud, and it is getting embarrassing, does anyone know if this could be caused by depression. I don’t know why I feel compelled to write on this page but I think it is because reading these comments gives me some semblance of reality.
Ive Thought About Suicide Before And Even Attempted It A Couple other times and every time i tried i got closer..and im not happy about heck wat 14 year old would be? i sure wasent…but one day a paster came to the hospital because id almost od..and he talked to me and prayed with me he was there 4 a couple oh hours just praying for me and when he left i came out saved…u see i never wanted to believe in god i hated him for making my life the way it was, for my mom leaving me when i was born, and when my bestfriend died in 7th grade. i wanted to die..and i was but then the preacher came and prayed with me and i was scared..i was dying from all the pills id had and i told god if he changed my life so i wouldnt die and i wouldnt feel so lost inside id be with him till the day he decidied to take me home..and he did,and im still alive today! 🙂 I guess what im trying to say is kno tht u are lived even if u dont think u are..heck i was 13 when i od, and got saved and im now 15..and i havent had a single thought since..thinks to god. someone does love u and he dosent want to see u suffer..
ha
What is honorable when you are but a failure? I find nothing but death. Farewell.
Life is worth living.
Your entire life is going to be completely different in 2- 5 years time, you find it hard to comprehend that, but you will have completely different people around you, people that love you, people that care, you just need to get through this part of life, once you reach the other side you will be so very glad for all the pain, it will give you so much perception, you will have so much more understanding and empathy than anyone and you will be able to hep others, you will know what happiness is, and you will know where you have come from. You will feel so blessed that you fought against all the shit, that you had so much sadness and pain and you still got through it, you would have lived a thousand more lives than someone the same age as you that that had an easy ride, you will be wise and know where you came from, what it took and how you ended up where you will be, and from that, you will be able to help so many people.
People that breeze through life will not have the power to help others with depression the way you do, we need people like you, we need you to get to the other side so that you can show us what worked, what helped you get through this, what advice to give others, what we need to provide to help people in need.
Do not leave us without showing us how to help you and others like you. We need you.
The world needs you.
Mishy.
[email protected]
Life is worth living.
Your entire life is going to be completely different in 2- 5 years time, you find it hard to comprehend that, but you will have completely different people around you, people that love you, people that care, you just need to get through this part of life, once you reach the other side you will be so very glad for all the pain, it will give you so much perception, you will have so much more understanding and empathy than anyone and you will be able to hep others, you will know what happiness is, and you will know where you have come from. You will feel so blessed that you fought against all the shit, that you had so much sadness and pain and you still got through it, you would have lived a thousand more lives than someone the same age as you that that had an easy ride, you will be wise and know where you came from, what it took and how you ended up where you will be, and from that, you will be able to help so many people.
People that breeze through life will not have the power to help others with depression the way you do, we need people like you, we need you to get to the other side so that you can show us what worked, what helped you get through this, what advice to give others, what we need to provide to help people in need.
Do not leave us without showing us how to help you and others like you. We need you.
The world needs you.
Mishy.
[email protected]
There are people who care, there is happiness, there is peace here on earth, you just need the freedom to find it, your circumstances and life will change and you will find it, i promise you this. You will find it all here. You do not need to kill yourself.
This made me cry…. I wish I was happy.
another year has started for me.
another year for pondering suicide and wondering if any of my friends do the same or accomplish it.
another year of being 16/17 and living in a poor excuse of a world of music and being embarrissed by my happy and “perfect” generation.
another year of feeling alone.
another year of pretending to be happy to all my friends.
another year of thinking its going to work out great for myself, when i know, deep down its not..
as “steve” said it is a new year and with it the same complications we are all tired of existing not even really living with the unbearable pain that our own inadequacies bring to our proverbial table i screw everything up on a consistant basis and,im sure, if you feel there is no other way, there is no escape other than nonexistance i belive it is selfish for our ‘loved ones’ to want us to go one in such agony if you feel like me, like even at such a late point in life you bring nothing to the party except dissapointment then please do it, i know my displaced children, my estranged family and i would rest easier, if it were that simple to get past the fear of painfull death. i cannot belive that our good and merciful god would condemn you and i to an eternity of suffering for ending our own reign of terror on those we love surely that is what He intended when he made us this way my suggestion to you is embrace the death you long for and if you are scared as i am of pain and embaressment of unsuccesfulness of an attempt may bring then embrace your lot in life as one of the true ‘zombies’ the dead inside
When I decide to commit suicide. I would wish for Pumped Up Kicks to play in the background while I turn on the gas on my stove, and let it fill the home, light a match and set a blaze. That or to take my Lithium pills and pull in a prayer to die.
please email me if you need help. i am happy to help you.
It needs to be said that NOBODY is happy all the time, you need to understand that. it is VERY unrealistic to think that you will one day be happy EVERY day ALL day. try and find one happy moment a week, even in the simple things, the ocean, the sky, the water, anything and if you can you are on the right track. If you try you will find one moment, a moment with a smile. That is a point to start with, a point to grow from and eventually you will train yourself to not listen to your mind, you ARE not your mind, you are a spirit, and the more that you listen to your mind it will take over your spirit and your personality, the more the mind will control you, you need to take control and make yourself start at the start and grow from there, it is not your fault that you feel this way up until this point, but it is your fault if you dont TRY.. try something small and see how you go. BLESS. XXXX
[email protected]
Every single day of my life I want to die…I tried sleeping pills when I was 14 and mixing many and lots of meds….I started cutting a while a go….one time I went to a water park…knowing I cannot swim…I went to the deep end of the pool hoping to die..
I have no reason to live…it seems like everyone around me would be much better…they all hate me….I’m never loved…never will be…I’m tired of being hurt by the ppl I care about, raped, threaten, ect….I’m just tired…and I want to go to sleep…but I’m afraid of hell…
Ppl are always going around saying “people would kill to be in my spot….thank god for waking you up”
Well…I never asked to be born…
“Every now and then”
please email me, i will help you.
Mishy.
[email protected]
[email protected].
ive been raped,beaten, and hurt in everyway possible pretty much…my dad beats me almost every night, stan rapes me at least once a month and im buliemic, i cut to try to forget about the pain but it doesnt help anymore…im 16 and im going to kill myself this summer so my friends will have time to forget about me before school starts back up, thats if my dad hasnt murdered me by then…that would make things easier but he always knows when to stop:(…my best friend and the girl im in love with know about everything but i wont let them help me…i love them so much but i cant take this anymore…im going to hold out as long as i can for them but i know thats not gonna be very long…Amanda and chelsea…if u ever read this im so sorry i was a burden to u and im sorry for everything i ever did to hurt you…and amanda please keep the promises u made to me…and im sorry u had to see my cuts
These letters comfort me in a way an male me happy to know I’m not alone but my love for man saddens me for it hurts to know others feel war I feel an wouldn’t hope on anyone. I’ve seen parents wives siblings post on these kind of letters pleading for others to think of their families but what they fail to understand is their loved ones are at peace they hurt no more. They say its the easy way out but I’m sure there’s nothing easy about leaving ur family to take ur life to come to the point of hopelessness. They say its selfish think of ur family but I think its selfish to want someone to continue to live in pain on a daily basis where u don’t have to hurt an they don’t even enjoy their quality of life enough to even want to get out of bed each day. // Justin Montgomery age 23 Texas.
Broken!!
dont kill yourself,there is help.there are people who can help…please.
this is really sad no one should kill themselves sure there are plenty of reasons to kill urself, but think of ur friends and love ones, dont have any? well think of god, why would he put you here, dont belive in god? then how can u make ur life better, talk to someone about it and confront ur problems so u will be happy dont give up
I shed no tears
I feel no pain
I have no fears
I will leave a stain
i m 22.girl.alone
i hate myself 4 my look.is it stupid?my brother is goodlooking but me?! ha!
i did plastic surgery but it failed.i feel disgusting
i have big dreams but no money left.i am in prison which name is iran,maybe if i…
there s no hope left.i need someone 2 love me,not hating me…now i feel that i wanna puke………
i
i wanna die so badly can anyone help me? but im scared to die i really need help i really do my lifes shit and i cant handle it please i need help
To all here on this website..
You all are here because you are searching for someone who relates to you. HERE WE ARE. we are all here for one another. Reach out to us. Reach out to me. [email protected]. Dont think twice and please talk to me. i am here for you and i love you all.
Hello im only 11 and im already tired of all the stuff i go through it sux i think tht the end of my life would be the best to me if u can help me get this stuff away Please help me
My friend who is sucidal now…….. I am tryin my best…….. but her mother is oppressing her so much I don’t know can I succeed. Her family is broken, living in a extreme poverty, her mom lives on the gov’t, 50yrs old, not willing to find a job. While her dad has other children, and lives with his mom, and is unwilling to paid child support, and lives on the gov’t. My friend alone who has to take up with the stress of classmates, and a little part time in library which is not enough. I know if she continues she cannot survive given her noble character.
ive given up. my gf of two yrs just dumped me .my life just sucks im in a bad mood everyday…even before the break up.. i dont have much family.. life hurts alot more,, when you die the pain is ovr.. my idea is painless ..ive had thoughs of this all my adult life. but latly im serious. ive been reading letters for like ten hrs… im 29 and ive never been truely. im not waiting another 29
ive given up. my gf of two yrs just dumped me .my life just sucks im in a bad mood everyday…even before the break up.. i dont have much family.. life hurts alot more,, when you die the pain is ovr.. my idea is painless ..ive had thoughs of this all my adult life. but latly im serious. ive been reading letters for like ten hrs… im 29 and ive never been truelyhappy im not waiting another 29
i just wish someone cared im an attractive person i have agood job.. why do i hurt every day… i just started taking ads..i just feel ive overstayed my welcome..drugs and
drugs and booze dont even work anymore…. i need help.. im more scared of living then i am dying.. cant anyone help????i lost the only person i thought cared
i feel like nobody in my life givs shit so why should i?